Janine is a heavy drinker and not an alcoholic. She said, but I am not so sure she’s not. In an article she said, AA killed her marriage.
Now why then does she blame AA for killing her marriage? – Is it because:
* Her husband stopped drinking with AA, ..or because
* He went to regular AA meetings, …or is it because…
* He started working the 12 steps of AA
* In the article its stated that, he had a personality change and apparently the change was not for the better – in her opinion. Instead she states, We simply could not live together, because when people do get sober, they change radically.
Well of course alcoholics change radically if they have an opportunity to get sober. It’s obvious that Bruno attending AA meetings and staying out of the old environment does not suite Janine. She instead wants him to be drinking.
Once Bruno stops drinking he will start to get sober. It takes 5 to 7 years. He will then becomes the person he wanted to be before alcohol took control of his life.
Oh, and it’s important to note that he will still be exciting. That is to someone who loved him and not just his pay packet and unpredictable lifestyle. The right person is not another drunk in his life. He will die if he stays with her if she is drinking.
Facts are obviously not important to Janine. Instead it’s all about her, and what she wants. Basically she doesn’t want to lose her drinking partner. Signs that she is an alcoholic as well. Her story about Bruno is that, He started to drink to numb the fear, the pain…
That excuse simply does not cut it. Alcoholics drink because they are alcoholics and don’t need any other reason. And when they are ready they must go to AA if they want to get sober. they do this by telling their own story, not have it told by someone else. When getting sober he simply can not afford to be in a relationship with someone who is drinking. An alcoholic must get out of the old environment for him to survive AA and to get sober.
Janine states Bruno wants to get sober and she’s wrong in her belief as to why alcoholics need to get sober by attending AA. meetings. It is known that health reasons alone will not stop them drinking alcohol. Facts are that when drinking they have no choice but to drink unless they are going to AA. This is one of the differences between drug addicts and alcoholics. Addicts take drugs because they choose to and once an alcoholic starts to drink he continues because he has to. He can not stay stoped for any length of time unless he attends AA meetings. Also if he does not stop drinking fairly quickly he will die. AA is the only thing known that has results with getting people sober.
Janine said she, was the girl with the broken wing, … Possibly she needs to considered the possibility that she is an alcoholic as well.
If not then he did need to leave her, for his own good. The older sober members (OSM) of AA call people like her a, lame duck. (she obviously has something wrong with her) Something else wrong besides an alcohol problem. It’s strongly advised that anyone wanting to get sober in AA can not afford to have lame ducks around them.
Her article is about his problem however we can assume SHE continued to drink after Bruno stopped drinking and started attending AA meetings. Well then, of course she wouldn’t fit in with his new sober friends. She does she say she even slows down her drinking during this time.
Still drinking while Bruno is trying to stay sober. No wonder the marriage broke down. Also note in her article she still associated with the drunks of the past and she actually criticizes Bruno for not wanting to do the same.
Janine’s complaint is not the fault of AA. Her readers who didn’t know better would be inclined to believe her when she said that, AA killed her marriage, Instead of knowing that it is her, continuing to drink that killed the marriage.
Janine said, He was drinking every single night, not sleeping and sinking into a hopeless depression, the result of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder… before he attended AA meetings.
She doesn’t recognise that he is sober due to AA. The issues he has other then alcoholism is not the concern of AA members. They are not equipped to deal with health problems that are not AA related, such as, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, due to the war.
Janine did admit Bruno is successful at not drinking due to him attending AA meetings. She then said he also began working the 12 steps of AA.
Interesting to note she doesn’t say anything against him working steps. We are to assume she thinks that’s okay. On the other hand if she said this is when the problem started, this would be understandable, but she doesn’t say his working the 12 steps was any sort of a problem.
Instead she said, I went to an AA Christmas party, and while everyone was friendly and welcoming, it was clear they set a wall between ‘us and them. What would Janine be doing at an AA function if she was not an alcoholic? And what kind of wall? Is her problem that AA people were not drinking alcohol? I
If she’s not complaining about him working steps, then what is the complaint?
Let it be known that sober alcoholics are normal people. They do not have a wall between themselves and normal people in society. They do on the other hand learn that they must avoid nutters who drink. She obviously fits this category.
She is complaining her husband chooses not to associate with her friends who are drunks. Then she says this killed her marriage along with him attending Alcoholics Anonymous.
She states she is not an alcoholic but yet she would rather her marriage fall apart then to give up alcohol herself. Obviously she would rather be in a smelly saloon bar. The pubs and bars are the smelly and rough places, not the church halls she says are smelly and where AA meetings are held.
She really is delusional and in denial of her own drinking problems.